Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Sacha Baron e a genitalia de Ken Davitian ou...

... O que eu tenho de fazer para ganhar um prémio e depois marcar território tendo em conta que não vou ganhar o óscar

A noite foi recheada de discursos, mas apenas um deles ficará marcado como o discurso da noite, o de Sacha Baron Cohen ao aceitar o Prémio para Melhor Actor numa Comédia ou Musical. Aqui fica a transcrição do original do discurso:

"Warren? Where is he? It's 'wha-wha-we-wha.'
I want to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press. And I just want to say that this movie was a life-changing experience. I saw some amazing, beautiful, invigorating parts of America. But I saw some dark parts of America, an ugly side of America. A side of America that rarely sees the light of day.
I refer, of course, to the anus and testicles of my co-star, Ken Davitian. (Aud laughs as the camera finds Davitian shrugging and raising a wine glass to Cohen.) Ken, when I was in that scene and I stared down and saw your two wrinkled golden globes on my chin, I thought to myself, 'I better win a bloody award for this.'
And then when my 300-pound co-star decided to sit on my face and squeeze the oxygen from my lungs, I was faced with a choice: Death or to breathe in the air that had been trapped in a small pocket between his buttocks for 30 years.
Kenneth, if it was not for that rancid bubble, I would not be here today.
(Music starts as Cohen holds up Globe gesturing to Davitian. He starts rushing through the rest.)
Thank you to Larry Charles, thank you to Jay Roach, thank you to Isla Fisher, my fiancee. Thank you to Peter Baynham, Anthony Hines and Dan Mazer; thank you to Ari Emanuel; Matt Labov; Erran Baron Cohen, my brother who did the music; and to Jason Alper and (unintelligible due to swelling music). And thank you to every American who has not sued me so far. Thank you."

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